Finding Community at Sex Geekdom LA

Posted by on October 9, 2012 in Community, LA, Sex Geekdom | 3 comments

Several months ago, I was looking for a local sex positive community. I started doing periodic searches online didn’t find many options. To my surprise, something new popped up mid summer: Sex Geekdom LA. I was familiar with Kate McCombs and her Joys of Sex Geekdom site. I would often see the updates about the Sex Geekdom events in Melbourne but never expected one here in the states. Certainly not one in LA!  An evening of “burritos and ball jokes” sounded like lots of fun. It’s a bit of a drive to West Hollywood for me though, and almost backed out when the weekend found me rather exhausted. A good friend reminded me this was opportunity not to pass up and I would not regret going. She was right.

It was a small group with Kate as our hostess. We were also excited to have Sex Nerd Sandra Daugherty join us. Walking into a group with few familiar faces was a bit frightening but I was welcomed so warmly. We sat outside Chipotle on Santa Monica sharing jokes and stories. We had such a great time, it was agreed we must meet again. We talked meeting again and how most of us would be at CatalystCon. What a great place to find more sex geeks to invite! Jenna, Debbie and I offered to help with the next event since Kate would be returning to Australia at the end of this trip.

I checked in shortly before CatalystCon to find plans were in the works for the next meeting. Jenna was looking for location idea and I was happy to brainstorm. We needed something big enough for a large group and in a central location. Barbarella Bar in Silverlake met all our needs. Reservations were made, fliers were printed, and we went to CatalystCon ready to gather as many sex geeks as we could to join us.

And join us they did.

I arrived at Barbarella Bar late. I read some tweets from people on their way but had no idea how many people had actually turned out until I got there. When I arrived I stepped into the front bar area to find several familiar faces seated around the couches. Sex Nerd Sandra was the first person I greeted. She could only stay for an hour due to other plans but she stayed a little longer to chat. I don’t think I stopped talking from the moment I arrived until I left four hours later.

I greeted Jenna who was thrilled with the turn out. I chatted with Ramin from along with Sandra. I then caught up with my friend Marc who had come all the way down from Ventura. I met Christina and Stevie and we talked about finding local resources for the LGBT community outside of West Hollywood. We moved to a different table and conversation continued with Jenna, Tim, Raul, and Debbie. We talked about safe sex, education, and recognizing different gender identities when doing student surveys. We also talked about our hopes that LGBT and multiple partnered relationships would become a normal everyday part of how families are represented in the media. We had lots of laughs and shared our own stories with each other. We ended the evening feeling like much had been accomplished.

We think about 20 to 25 people were in attendance. I didn’t get to talk to everyone, unfortunately, but was comforted by the idea that we would meet again. Everyone was really excited about the group and looked forward to the next event. We got icebreaker ideas and location suggestions for those who had to travel far to get there. New friends were made and lots of business cards were exchanged. I’m sure everyone was searching for newfound friends on Twitter and Facebook afterward. I had new followers before I even returned home! Jenna, Debbie and I parted company ready to work on our next meeting.

Sex Geekdom LA is already set to have the next meeting on November 2nd. We’re going to stick with Barbarella Bar for a little bit since it worked really well for us. LA is a sprawling city with mountains to traverse and lots of traffic so we discussed moving the events around periodically to ease up the drive for some. Enthusiastic emails have been exchanged and we’re received several tweets asking about the next event so they can join us. So fellow Sex Geeks reading this blog, if you’re anywhere in the Los Angeles area, please join us. You don’t have to be a sex educator – just someone who has a passion for sex-positivity and wants to share that passion with others. You can freely talk about new ideas, how things are working in your community, hopes for the future, and how to throw a vulva cupcake party. Looking forward to seeing you at our next event!